I started thinking about certain career paths and unis and whatnot and what if.. I don't go to uni :O:O:O:O BLASPHEMY, I know! But what about NIDA? Can I go there? It sure would be nice. I could study writing or directing and make a wondonderous movie! I could! Perhaps. But it would mean no uni, no "smart" future, a big chance of failing and not making so much money and it'd be super-hard to get in in the first place. But it's what I want to do. But not what I should. Lately, I've been plagued by this question. This choice. This decision. Should I follow my dreams? Or my expectations? And if the world were simple, the answer would be happiness and I'd live a long, happy life as a world-famous director. But no. The world is anything but. THERE ARE JUST SO MANY FACTORS! Money, quality, opportunities, risk, time, determination, business, EVERYTHING. Gosheth. But drama is where my heart is. LOL And then there's the whole I ain't all that when it comes to drama thing but yeah. .......... DAMMIT, FUTURE, WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO TO ME? What is in store? Where are all the pretty people?! .... Wait, what? LOL I could really use the professor's what if machine right now.
Anywho, I've decided that i want to learn French after the HSC. And I will work my ass out. And I will have lots of fun going out with friends. And I will get a boyfriend. Of course, all those things won't happen because I'm lazy and unattractive, BUT HEY! There are things to do at home. Like Mass Effect :D And stuff. .... Also, I should turn off my tumblr. It's kind of taking all my time and turning me into a zombie. A very emotional zombie, yes, but a bad student also. LOL but when will I delete it? Should I start working now? If I open my Foetus Food store, will my Placenta Pies sell like hotcakes? All these questions, and choices and decisions. Too many, I say! TOO MANY. LOL Okay, there aren't too many, it's just that they're too hard to make. What if I base the rest of my future on the flip of a coin? Okay, let's try that. Heads is engineering and tails is drama. Okay, I'm going to look for a coin, flip it and come back with the results.
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And yet the experiment is stupid. Because I know what I want. And that's drama. But a coin can't really tell me what I should do. Not like this :L It reminds me of this picture I saw with a caption, where it's like "When you flip the coin, during the seconds when it's in the air, you will be hoping for what you really want and know." Or something like that. Yeah, it was super tacky but it was true. And I want NIDA. But chance doesn't know enough, and neither do I. So I guess it'll either be playing it safe or taking a risk. Show business is a risky business. LOL this is all assuming I can actually make it into a uni, of course :L Fingers crossed and head glued to the table. And yeah, I will still strive for an ATAR in the 90's range, no matter what. If I can get a ninety something, it shall be my net. Anywho, here's a nice lyric I found on tumblr. It's from a Led Zeppelin song.
"If the sun refused to shine, I would still be loving you. When mountains crumble to the sea, there will still be you and me. Kind woman, I give you my all, Kind woman, nothing more."
I also like the chorus for Blue Jeans by Lana.
"I will love you 'til the end of time."
Which remind me. If I had a band, I would call it "Lana Backwards". ... LOL It's incredibly immature and crude but I like it. Nothing to do with Del Rey though. Just thought I'd mention :) It kinda reminds me of the band name "Jane's Addiction" LOL Let's make a tribute band and call it "Wilson Huynh" :L God, I hope they haven't broken up recently. Because this joke would be super awkward. Okay. Bye :L
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