But first, myself. I've noticed that I have this strange sort of attitude or way of life where I act a lot more gorgeous than I look. Like I compliment myself way too much and I go around acting all pretty and shit. Acting like I'm that chick who can get a free drink in a second. I realise that I'm not, with my many physical flaws, but I like to embrace my face and act all ace (hahahha fun sentence, I'm very lame). And it's a good thing I guess, but sometimes it can be a bit excessive, hey? Like self-confidence is fantastic, don't let anybody ever ever ever ever take that away from you. It's sacred and precious and so powerful. But you know the phrase "drunk on power"? Sometimes it can be obnoxious. It's the premise of a douchebag (hahhaha look at me try to write go0d) and it can ruin a reputation. And I can definitely be a bit excessive. But you've seen it before, right? It's marked by too many selfies and an obsession with the camera. It's those people who are just a bit above average but they act like they deserve to be instafamous, posting selfies left right and centre on IG (das me) and then they feed off all the likes they gather from said selfies (das me). And I know, I know, I know, I know I said all that stuff about the sacredness that is self confidence but sometimes, you can be a bit annoying. And it starts sounding a bit more like self-obsessed than self-confident. And when you're in this position, you don't stop being who you are - it's just who you are!
So embrace it. Embrace how eh you really are based on conventional beauty standards and then flaunt it. Don't just flaunt your average looks, flaunt how comfortable you are with it. Important though - don't be a douchebag. Don't adopt a sense of superiority when you do this. Be humble. Humility is a very important thing. And above all, give back. When you see a selfie, like it. If the person's nice and you don't hate them or dislike, like their photo. It's a nice gesture and so easy. Don't be prude and don't be that guy who feels as if their likes represent their freedom of speech and that you have to earn likes. That's cool, man, but get over yourself for at least a bit and like a friend's selfie. Yeah, you are allowed to like what you like but seriously, there are those people who act like their likes are better than everyone else's because they "refuse to throw them away or give them out willy nilly". Ugh.
Anyways, getting away from instagram selfies but continuing on from this notion of 6's acting like 9's - I've also noticed that when it comes to boys - I like them pretty. But do I deserve pretty? Or rather, with my looks, will I ever get a pretty boy? And it's become a thing where I'm too good for some people or so I think and that's what makes me a douchebag. And yet, it's something we all do. That's why that second most popular line from perks of being a wallflower was so powerful. Because it was so profoundly but also plainly true - "we accept the love we think we deserve". So are most of us douchebags? You'd think this is a rhetorical q aimed at you but really it's a real question that I'm actually asking myself as I write this post. Because really, idk what I'm saying lol.....
OKAY LET'S JUST TALK ABOUT BOYS, I'VE CONFUSED MYSELF.
I want a boy who will make me laugh. I have plenty of friends who make me laugh but they're all either women or just not quite for me. I mean, I guess based on the people I've had feelings for in the past, I'm not attracted to very funny people and if anything just people who will laugh at my jokes (also a very important quality). But it'd be so nice if I found a boy my age who I could get along with so well. I want a best friend kinda bf, that's what I'm in the mood for. Dangarang. Okay, I'm done with this post.
But of course, with my attitude, they gotta look good.
BTW, I'm gonna try and get a post out every two days and see if that works lol. BYE.
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