Cologne

I think I'd wear that in the future. Not every day, but on dates and stuff. LOL When I'm all grown up, filthy rich and at least a tiny bit dateable. Anywho, can't seem to get American Boy by Estelle out o' my head. It's fun. I like it. .... I had more to say, I know it. Hm. Well, Snezzywezzy's birthday was a lot of fun. Twas twas, twas twas. Anywho, get ready for more future fears. Or is it future... realisations? Okay, so maybe getting straight into film is a bad idea. Maybe, I should take the sensible path and dance my way into- sorry. Got distracted. Maybe I should get some sort of an engineering degree first and then get into film. That way I have something somewhat reliable to fall back on and my parents will look at me. But, then again, I can't shake the feeling that I will only ever achieve unhappiness, regrets and crapcrapcrap, but then again, it's just, in a way, merely, delayed happiness, ya see? My desire can wait. I wonder what Christopher Nolan or Joss Whedon did. I wonder how they lived their lives. Did they know they were going to be great? Or did they take a leap into the unknown (but slightly known) pit of futurism, satanism, dancedancedancedancedance- apologies again. Goshgoshgosh, this is so hard! Ugh. Flergenbergen, I'm so confused. Okay. Okay. Cool head, calm tits, clear mind. I WANT TO BE A STARRRRRRRR. OH! I booked tickets to go see Batman Begins + The Dark Knight at the cinemas, and then when those two finish - the midnight screening of The Dark Knight Rises. Ahhhhh, so excited. Triple dose of Batman AND Monsieur Nolan. Yay. Of course, I don't deserve it with the amount of study I've been doing. The amount being near zero. Estelle once said to me, cool down down, don't act a fool now now. lol. I think it's time for a new paragraph.

I think I need to get my script read out again. Not acted, just read out. Hopefully, I can get a few friendly peeps from drama to help me out. Also, I want to ask a certain someone to ze Formal but I'm too shy, I'm very sure he'll say no, and lol, rejectionnnnn. But everybody else is doing it :( I wonder what it's like being pretty. LOL I've been meaning to exercise lately but there's just always that one thing killing me, weighing me down. LAZINESS. LOL I'm just too gosh darn lazy to move the whole treadmill into the way. There are too many crapses in the way to move and worst of all - spiders. I know, I know. I should be better this, I can help myself, the only person standing in the way is myself but oh my god. I NEED A MUSCULAR, SHIRTLESS MAN TO HELP ME MOVE THE TREADMILL AND FEND ME FROM THE SPIDERS. Any burly readers, feel free to volunteer. LOL I just saw Michelle Po pop up on msn and her dp was of a man. I'm assuming it's a celebrity she admires. Hm. LOL I remember that time Jess linked me to a vid titled cute and handsome guy and it was just some 22-yearold who was in love with himself, silently laughing and smiling at the camera for forty seconds. ..... LOL He was pretty cute and handsome, but his douchiness kind of got in the way. Cut to next paragraph.

Whenever I'm faced with a difficult decision, mainly between doing something crazy or saving myself the possible chance of embarrassment, I always have this one thing that pushes me towards doing that crazy thing. And when I say crazy, I just mean something like telling a boy I like him or taking a chance yayaya. And when it comes to these horrible decisions, I always tell myself: William, do not forget, if you don't do it, you never will. And when that happens, you might have to face that same horrible question for the rest of your life - What if? And of course, I guess that applies the other way too - where I could regret actually doing that crazy thing, but I try not to think about it. So in the end, I guess I should ask that boy to the formal. But I get this feeling that he's got eyes for someone else, what with his I LOVE YOU, LOVE ME BACK posts :\ And he might not be comfortable being with a boy in public. And then there's the whole issue with my face and blahblahblah, too many factors to consider. But hey, no regrets, bro. None.
           
Anywho, back to my script. Mr.... I still don't know how to spell his name. Adrian [since he is no longer our student teacher (I'm talking about the Fej, by the way, our drama student teacher)], while he was still in Canley, said that he really wanted to read the ending of my script before he left. And lol, he never did, but I guess I could give him a copy at showcase or something. Anywho, he got me thinking - how in the world do I end my script. I mean, I had always thought I would just end it with one last crash and the bar coming down but like, it's only a fifteen minute play. It is a tad bit quick. So I thought and thought, and alas, I could not think of anything cool. I really want to Nolan it and mindscrew the audience but of course, I'm not quite up to that status yet lolol but fear not. I'll have something. I hope.

The future is waiting, bobs. Jump before it's too late. Or fall.

Whichever.