'Cause I'm Mr Brightside.

Pros about our non-existent relationship:

•  Hm.
• I don't have to shame my parents by loving a Kambo Kid :L
• I can relate to an Adele song... with millions of other people :L
• I'm not entirely sure. In fact I just made this up, but let's just say "the most important ingredient for the perfect love story is heartbreak."
• I can relate to a paramore song :D

Cons:

• There are none because this worked out well and beautifully and great and you make me sad.